Read what a wife and her girlfriends say in private chat!

For the past month Barb has been spending time on a new private chatroom that she and several of her friends have set up. It's hosted on a sex-related site, so naturally a good deal of what they write about is sex. Barb has no idea I'm "eavesdropping" as she and her girlfriends talk about all sorts of secret, private stuff.

Moody: Husband went to bed. I'm sitting here with just my bra and panties. It's amazing how well I can type with one hand!

Celeste: What's that other hand doing!! :-)

Jennette: Fingers getting sticky?

Barb: Sitting at my PC and being private is a favorite way for me. There's so much on the Internet it's hard to keep your hands on the keyboard!

Moody: So what's your favorite way to come? Grace you still there?

Grace: Yeah, I'm here. Sorry I had to take a pee! I leave for one minute and you all are talking about friggin....typical.

Moody: Okay, I'll start. My most favorite way to orgasm is in the shower with the water massager. It's the kind with the spout that you can take off....

Jennette: Spout?

Moody: You know the water head. In the shower I get the water real warm. Put the massager about two inches from my clitoris. There's a setting to make the water a single hard jet instead of a spray, and that makes me come the fastest and hardest.

Barb: Do you come standing up?

Moody: Most of the time. Sometimes I have to lie down in the tub. I put a little water in, then lean all the way back. I like to prop my feet on either side of the tub. I'm pretty open. I then just hold the nozzle between my legs.

The water makes her horny

Feeling the warm water all around her, this blonde with natural boobs gives herself a vaginal probe.

Grace: Clean and satisfying at the same time.

Moody: The harder the stream of water the better. My poor clit gets really red and puffy when I'm done.

[Some boring off-topic stuff here edited out.]

Jennette: I'm not sure I have a favorite way really, but I do it the same almost every day and that's okay for me. After my husband and kids have left for the morning, I sit down in front of the TV. I watch TV while I rub myself with my fingers.

Barb: You mean porn? What do you watch?

Jennette: I don't watch much porn. I watch the Weather Channel, shopping channels, that sort of thing. There are a couple of guys that I fantasize about while I'm on the couch.

Barb: That sounds cool. Have you ever been caught while in the act?

Jennette: NO thank god! I'm usually still in my robe, and start by slipping my panties off. I tuck them into the couch, and one time I did forget to pull them back out. My son found them and it was an embarrassing moment let me tell you! If my husband found them he'd just assuming I was sleeping with someone. He doesn't think I'm capable of masturbating.

Grace: Jennette how long does it take you to cum that way?

Moody: there's a time limit now???....

Jennette: Depends, but usually about 15 minutes. Sometimes longer I do like to take my time but if it takes too long I get tired and frustrated and have to stop. Sorry.....I'm having a hard time being explicit about all this.

Barb: You're among friends...

Moody: Really we're here to experience this together.

Jennette: I usually just lie back with my head on the side of the couch. I start by scratching all around my pubic area, and flip through the channels until I find something I like. After a while I'm ready and I rub directly over the hood of my clit until I have an orgasm.

Celeste: Do you watch the TV all the way through? It's not distracting?

Jennette: I'm used to it. I like to come while I'm watching a nice looking guy. I lock my eyes on him and visualize us making love.

Grace: "Making love"? Jenn it's called fucking. Say it -- fucking.

Jennette: I know, fucking.

Barb: Fucking Fucking Fucking Fucking.

Moody: Fucking....

Barb: Now my turn! I have about 10 favorite ways to come.

Grace: You crave variety....

Barb: Yes I do. Lessee...a couple of my favorites: Lying face down on my stomach and rubbing my little clitty against a pillow. Sometimes I'll read something, or watch an X-rated tape. I prefer stuff fairly graphic. I also get turned on by waiting until my husband has gone to sleep, and playing with myself with him snoring right next to me. Something about the risk of being caught. I love the sneaking.

Moody: He never wakes up? I'm not that lucky. My husband is a light sleeper.

Barb: I have mine trained.

[Little does she know! -- Voy]

Barb: Sometimes I get really worked up. If we've just fucked, my pussy will still be really wet. I like the feeling of that. Sometimes I put in a vibrator or dildo and imagine getting a second fucking while my husband is there in bed, unaware! I'll never be able to do that, but it's fun fantasizing about it.

Celeste: I have a lot of time to myself since I travel so much. I don't know why, but I always get extra horny when I go out of town. My hormones really rage or something. I just lie on the bed in the hotel room and rub in a circles. I love having something inside me when I come. You can't bring a vibrator on board an airplane anymore without getting strange looks. So I'll bring along a shampoo bottle that has a knobby cap and a long neck.

Moody: Have you ever tried a curling iron?

Celeste: Mine has a clip permanently on the side, so it would be uncomfortable.

Barb: How about a zucchini or cucumber. Airport security wouldn't think twice about those.

Grace: You'd still get strange looks. Those people know why a female traveling alone has a cucumber in her carry-on!

Celeste: I hadn't thought about the cucumber. That sounds like an idea. Should I peel it first?

Barb: It feels more like a real cock when it's peeled, but it can come apart if you're not careful. With the peel on it feels like a cock with a condom around it. I like it either way.

Resourceful MILF uses an empty bottle to get herself off

You gotta appreciate a woman who knows how to improvise. In this case it's an empty bottle that fits perfectly into her bald slit.

Grace: Barb is the expert at using cucumbers!

Barb: I could write a book!!

Jennette: Can I talk about this? When I was a teenager I once tried a hot dog.

Moody: Not a good idea.

Jennette: No it wasn't. It broke off inside me.

Moody: Shit!

Jennette: I really freaked out. I could just imagine having to go to my mom with this hot dog up me. I was able to get it out though. I swore off food ever since!

Grace: Was this one of those ballpark franks...they plump up when you fuck 'em?

Barb: Hahaha

Jennette: :-)

Barb: Where you a virgin?

Jennette: Yes I just wanted to see what having a penis inside me would be like. Afterward I felt I was being punished for being curious.

Celeste: Been there done that!

[Some talk about strict religious upbringing removed here to save space.]

Moody: Grace, I think the bottle is point toward you now.

Grace: Well girls, the truth is I don't masturbate, ever. My sex life is so full I don't need it.

Barb: Yeah right. You're worse than me!

Jennette: Grace you joking or what??

Barb: Jenette doesn't know you very well!

Moody: I have a feeling that...

Grace: Of course I'm joking!! I single-handedly keep the vibrator industry in business.

Barb: Let me tell you that Grace never misses an opportunity to get her rock off.

Moody: Oh her "rock." I get it!

Grace: Let's see, my favorite way. I probably like humping things the most. I'm like Barb that I will rub against a pillow and cum that way. I sometimes scratch myself against the corner of a desk, or sit over the arm of the sofa and slide back and forth. I like cumming without touching my clit with my fingers.

Moody: I almost always tweak my nipples when I come.

Grace: Same with me. Sometimes reach around the back and put a finger into my asshole. (Can we say asshole here??)

Jennette: I'll admit to pulling my fingers out right at the moment of orgasm and smelling them. Is that weird?

Barb: Disgusting. Go away!

Grace: Ewwwww!

[Some additional banter removed here.]

Moody: I'm even more kinky!

Barb: Okay....we're waiting....

Moody: While I'm working on coming I usually get real wet. If I work my g-spot I'll even spray a little on the sheets.

Grace: Ah....we have a squirter!

Moody: After I come once I'll work myself up again, and stop right before I go over. I then dip my fingers into me and bring out as much of the juice as I can. Then I lick it and I come again, without even having to touch myself.

Jennette: You lick yourself?

Moody: Yess!! Does this mean I'm really a lesbian?? :-)

Grace: You'd definitely like to eat at the Y...

Barb: I've squirted from time to time. I'm not convinced it isn't just pee.

Moody: It doesn't taste like it. It tastes a little like a guy's cum. It's also thicker than pee, at least mine is.

Grace: Shit, who needs a guy! Between squirts that taste like jizz and Barb's cucumber salads!

Jennette: You could eat the cucumber when you're done using it.

Moody: Or cut it up and give it your guests!!

Barb: Okay that's it....this is getting too weird for me!

Grace: If I know Barb she's already out of her knickers and way ahead of the rest of us.

Barb: Want something else this time. Ladies I need to put on a tape and enjoy being a girl. Seeya.

Moody: Me too.

Barb: Bye for now...

Grace: Bye...

Clips and images are illustrative only.

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